INTERNET GRANDFATHER®

Happy People

                                            We encounter all sorts of people in our lives- rich and poor, young and old, strong and weak. When I try to sort out all of these people, to respond to their differences, I sometimes have a hard time. Perhaps it's just me, but I find myself ignoring these differences and treating all of these sorts the same. I find that if I treat everyone the same, they treat me the same. If I'm as polite as I can be, if I'm as cheerful as I can be, if I'm as nice as I can be, people usually respond in kind. A smile will usually produce a smile in response. In this way, I can ignore the differences. But there's one difference that seems to require a different response. It's the difference between happy and unhappy.

                                                       When we seek company, we naturally seek happy people and shun unhappy people. I find myself treating happy people and unhappy people differently. It's because of the way they behave. Unhappy people tend to anger, to hostility, to visible sadness. Happy people seem energetic, active, uncomplaining. Unhappy people blame others, happy people realize they are in control of their lives. I wish I could help everyone but it's more and more clear to me that I can't solve the problems of unhappy people.

                                                       I was recently browsing the web and came across an article about happiness by Gabrielle LeBlanc in O, The Oprah Magazine. I was struck by one point the author made. She noted that people don't realize the control they have over their own happiness. She said that many people ignore their own enjoyment, that they continue to spend much of life on things they don't enjoy and that they don't make proper effort to make themselves happy. I think she's right and, therefore, unhappy people have the solution to their problem within themselves. They not only don't need my help, my help wouldn't be useful.                                           

                                                       Our first duty in this circumstance is to ourselves.The best thing we can do for ourselves is to try to eliminate the things we don't enjoy and thereby find happiness. If we do that, we'll at least avoid complaining and making the people around us unhappy. If we do that, we'll also help the unhappy, if only by setting a good example.

10-20-08